How do you know whether your struggle to find success is due to the normal challenges inherent in any endeavor or because you’re not any good?

It’s a question I hear a lot. And it’s based on the assumption that somewhere, an objective assessment of your work can be made.

What would you do differently if you could know for sure?

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Several years ago, my brother, who is a software developer, changed jobs and went to work for a different company.

A pioneer in the work-from-home movement, he would still be coding from amidst the tangle of cables and blinking lights in his basement. But he’d be collaborating on an all-new project with all-new people.

I felt a pang of jealousy. “That’s not fair,” I thought. “He gets to work somewhere new, and I’m stuck doing the same thing.”

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I used to be frustrated that I didn’t have a lot of advice as a teenager about what to do with my education and career.

My parents didn’t really care whether I went to college (or if they had opinions, they didn’t express them). My guidance counselors were indifferent.

When I moved to Atlanta and started teaching music lesson, I encountered lots of kids whose parents were deeply involved in their choices.

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Would you walk away from multiple social media accounts with over 10,000 followers?

This is the story of my friend Whitney who did just that.

She started doing nail art back in 2012 and quickly got really good at it, which is how she does most things. She has an obsessive attention to detail and the ability to focus intensely — plus, she works very quickly and has excellent fine motor skills. The combination is powerful.

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In my city, there is a small restaurant that has a waiting list for brunch just about every weekend.

Theoretically, they are missing out on business as the wait gets longer. I stopped by one day at the height of the summer season. Upon finding out that it would take 45 minutes to be seated, I shook my head.

“See you in November!” I said with a smile. They laughed. I left.

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