Are you already where you want to be?

As a teenager, I hated the 4 PM sunsets of November in Maine. Now, I love them.

I happen to live in a city that I once visited on vacation.

Because of this, I often wonder: In a given moment, when I'm not actually working, what is the difference between being on vacation and not being on vacation?

Well, I'll tell you: It's doing the dishes. But a big part of it is the mindset. I've learned that I can be "on vacation" by changing my attitude.

We can easily go through life looking toward the future or the past instead of being where we are. What's more, we engage in many activities that allow us to disappear into another reality. This is not necessarily a problem, unless we become so discontented or impatient with our circumstances that we can't tolerate them. We want to escape, no matter what it costs us and what chaos it causes, and find ourselves in a better time or place.

The punchline, as we all know, is that you take yourself with you wherever you go. So if we're not happy here, we're probably not going to be happy there. The more we try to chase that future hypothetical happiness, the more elusive it becomes. But if we learn to appreciate the here and now, we can be happy everywhere.

That's not a new idea, but have you ever thought about applying it to your attitudes toward your own achievement?

So much of modern culture encourages us to reach for more: to be more, do more, and have more. It's possible to live our whole lives in a constant mode of seeking. When do we turn it off? When do we allow ourselves to be satisfied, even for a moment, with what we've done and how far we've come?

I've had to learn to do it consciously. I've had to learn to say, "I'm already where I want to be," and deliberately observe all the ways in which it is true.

It is possible build a life and career out of a joyful desire to create, instead of a constant, nagging sense that we are not enough. Out of each mindset, the same action might arise, but the energy around it is totally different if we're hoping that this is the thing that might fix us, as opposed to understanding that we're not broken.

For example, many people post on social media to get more attention, more likes, and more followers. How might your feelings about it change if you already had as much attention and validation as you wanted? Maybe you would enjoy the conversations more. Maybe you would share your opinions more confidently. Maybe you would walk away and never post again.

Now, can you put yourself in the shoes of the person who already has that attention and validation? In other words, can you inhabit that persona today? Maybe, through that lens, you will see your 159 followers as the complex, multidimensional humans they are instead of trying to get more of them. You might measure your success by what you have, not by what you don't. You might begin to feel like that person who has what they want. Well, guess what: You are.

People endlessly chase money, fame, love, admiration, happiness, contentment, excitement, esteem, and accomplishment. Once they have a habit of hunting, they don't always realize when they've caught their quarry and can stop. That's fine if the hunting has become a hobby. However, if the constant quest has become a source of stress, frustration, or anxiety, they can change the pattern. They don't have to keep grinding forever.

Walking along the shore on a beautiful summer day, I can choose to fill my mind with my to-do list. I can imagine how my life will be when I achieve a certain level of success. I can experience the itch of longing for that day when I've reached the pinnacle and I'll own one of the waterfront homes along my route.

Or, I can choose to be on vacation during that same walk, even for only twenty minutes of calm enjoyment of the present reality. If I lived in one of those homes, my walk would be exactly the same. What actually needs to change in that moment? Nothing. It's perfect.

For me, life is about cultivating and being present for as many of those kinds of moments as possible—moments in which I am exactly where I want to be, feeling complete and confident. The more time I spend there, the easier it is to stay there.

If you find it challenging to see your strengths and successes, you're not alone. One way to begin is to see whatever you're striving for as a choice toward expansion and growth—not something you need to do, but something you want to do. In so doing, you're acknowledging that what you have and what you are is already enough. It truly is.