Expect transformation

Just give it a few months… (Image by Michael Zeuschner from Pixabay)

One day in March, a parent came to visit The Little Middle School to see if it would be a good fit for her child.

She sat in on a high-level discussion in which students were making plans for our spring trip.

When she left, she said, “My kid can’t do this.”

Maybe she was right. But what I wanted to say was, “It’s March!”

Our students had been learning together since August — almost eight months of growth. What she was seeing isn’t where they started.

I’ve thought about that interaction from time to time in the years since. We don’t expect transformation from our educational experiences — we look for incremental gains. A little bit of knowledge every day.

However, that’s not always how it works. Physically, intellectually, and emotionally, humans often grow in spurts. There may appear to be no change for weeks or months, and then all of a sudden there’s a new version of the person you have known.

The patient doling-out of information and guidance that teachers organize in school is really just a way of biding our time until the next wave of transformation takes place.

This isn’t a broken system. But how might it change things if we expected and embraced transformation instead of contenting ourselves with incremental gains?

For one thing, we might allow ourselves to spend more than the “normal” amount of time and effort on something. If we think that 20 minutes of studying French every day over three years is the correct, slow and steady approach, we will probably see slow and steady results. On the other hand, we could spend three hours a day practicing French for a few months. Better yet, we could travel to a French-speaking region and completely immerse ourselves in the language for a few weeks. We will learn the language much faster than we might have thought possible.

Another approach to transformation is to question the very idea that it should take intense effort. Sometimes, transformation comes from a mindset shift that can be made in an instant by simply deciding to do so. For example, we can choose to start conversations with people instead of being shy. We can volunteer to try new things. We can commit to becoming better listeners. Making different choices is a transformation in itself, and these choices will lead to new habits and further transformation.

Someone who wishes to transform might also choose to make changes to their habits and circumstances directly. Getting enough sleep can create dramatic changes in a person’s health, outlook, intellectual acuity, and skill-building. Moving to a new neighborhood or a new school creates all kinds of transformational energy. A new pair of glasses or a new haircut can do the trick as well.

As a mentor, I make a game out of seeking avenues to guide transformation. This is how a person can go from a first-grade math level to a sixth-grade one in a matter of months, rebuild a broken financial situation in a year, or completely change the way they approach their relationships with peers overnight. At our school, such wild metamorphosis happens often and means that our springtime students are dramatically different from who they were the previous fall.

Regardless of the situation, a person’s belief in their own ability to transform, along with their willingness to do so, makes it happen more quickly and easily. To that end, we talk about the change we are hoping to make in ourselves, plan on it, and then recognize it when it arrives. Change isn’t necessarily easy or comfortable, but it can be anticipated and welcomed.