On a recent episode of WTF with Marc Maron, the host interviewed good old Jerry Seinfeld.

Jerry loves to be prickly and contrarian. Often, when Marc would ask him a direct question, Jerry’s answer would be simply, “No.” Reluctantly, he’d elaborate.

No, Jerry doesn’t believe comedians need to reveal anything about themselves. They just need to be funny.

No, they don’t need to have had crummy childhoods. They just need to be funny.

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There is a phrase that brings joy to my teacher heart — three little words that make me feel like all my effort is worth it and my time on earth will leave some legacy.

When a student is willing to say these words after days, weeks, or months of working together, I know that they trust me and we can make rapid progress moving forward.

No, not “I love you.”

The three little words are, “I don’t know.”

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When a kid cleans her room, she may use some unorthodox tidying tactics.

Theoretically, everything should find a home where it is grouped with like items. However, there isn’t always time and energy for that. Shoving everything into drawers and closets, while hasty and perfunctory, is actually a good start. At least the room looks tidy. The details can be addressed later.

There are many situations in school, work, and life where we get stuck because we want to to do things well. We might spend hours, days, or even years trying to summon the energy to approach our task the right way. In the meantime, the deed remains undone. If we give ourselves permission to take the easy way out — to do the work badly or take shortcuts — we may actually accomplish what we set out to do.

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At a party for The Little Middle School, I watched a student cut herself a piece of cake.

It was a challenging motor planning exercise with many elements. At what angle should the knife be held? What side of the cake should I cut into? How do I deal with the fact that my height relative to the cake is not optimal? How do I get the cake onto my plate with this cake knife? How do I balance the weight transfer of the piece of cake onto the plate I’m holding if my dominant hand is busy with the cake knife?

She managed — barely. But it was time well spent. The more she practices such tasks, the better she will get at them. There is no shortcut and no substitute.

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While the other children around him settled into their lunchtime routine, one eleven-year-old stood agitated in front of the silent microwave. “Ah!” he yelled, and pressed buttons wildly. “Grrr!” He banged on the machine in frustration.

One of the teachers walked over and said gently, “We say, ‘Hey, could I have some help with this?’” She showed the student which buttons to press, and he was on his way.

That this student is unable to intuit how to use that particular microwave is no big deal; however, his inability to ask for help is a major problem. He’s not alone — this is something we see over and over again with children and adults.

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