Lessons learned from a tiny Thai place

If the show does its job, we’ll forget all about the theater. (Image by CchrisS)

One of my favorite restaurants is a fluorescent-lit paradise called Little Bangkok, in Atlanta.

The restaurant doesn’t have enough parking, so people double-park and you can’t leave until the guy behind you comes out and moves his car. Their color scheme is soft pink and baby blue — with bright red booths. The decor is kitschy. They don’t take AMEX. The neighborhood is not that great. What’s more, their website is generic.

And yet, I go to Little Bangkok every chance I get. I love the food, the people, and the experience. I don’t need them to have a fancy website.

There are a lot of cultural rules about what it takes to be successful in the world. If you’re a corporate executive, you might have to dress a certain way, drive a certain car, and live in a certain type of house in a certain neighborhood. If you’re in seventh grade, you need to dress a certain way, know certain slang, and get a certain number of likes on a selfie. And if you’re a business owner, you might be required to have a certain kind of web presence, a certain kind of polish to your physical location, and a certain type of high-status clientele (and the testimonials to prove it).

These cultural rules can be overwhelming. The happiest people are those who are able to recognize that following these rules is optional. Instead, they pay attention to what matters.

For a corporate executive, what matters might be having key relationships that will ensure your continued rise in a company.

For the seventh grader, having one or two true and trusted friends makes the experience bearable, even if you don’t have the right phone or the most stylish shoes.

And for a small restaurant like Little Bangkok, what matters is the food.

It’s all too easy to get distracted by everything else that’s out there. When we see someone else doing something cool, we might feel inadequate and believe that we should follow their lead. If we repeat this many times with many different people, we wind up getting lost.

Especially when we’re starting out and aren’t sure who we are, we can get swept up in looking to those who seem to be farther ahead on the journey for how we should behave. However, just because something worked for them doesn’t mean it will work for us. What’s more, we might be observing something that is the result of their success, not the cause. Fancy business cards, a website with fancy graphics, a fancy office…Maybe that girl isn’t popular because she’s funny. Maybe everyone is laughing at her jokes because she’s popular.

As a result of all of these inputs, we might not be sure what matters. And even if we figure out what matters, we might not know how to be successful.

I believe that our best bet is to figure out what we’re best at and put our energy into getting even better. From there, we will find a path forward that matches our strengths and allows us to connect with people who value what we have to offer.

Unfortunately, getting really good at something doesn’t always mean that we’ll stand out. The brutal truth is that some activities are more glamorous than others. We might have to let go of following some of the people we admire, recognizing that we can’t be just like them. However, in doing so, we’re becoming who we are.

I hope Little Bangkok never changes a thing. To me, their imperfections make them delightful and irresistible. I’m sure your fans could say the same about you.