How to positively influence others using "teacher vibes"

I’ll never forget a concert I went to years ago at Variety Playhouse in Atlanta.

I do forget the headliner. But the opener was a Kiwi singer-songwriter named Carla Werner.

She stepped up to the mic, barefoot and holding a guitar. “Hello, Atlanta…” she intoned. A hush fell over the crowd.

She wasn’t forceful or loud. She didn’t need to be. The concertgoers found themselves completely transfixed by her very presence. And she was the opening act.

The ability to get a group’s attention riveted upon you is a useful skill even if if you’re not a professional performer. You see it often in the classroom. A rookie teacher will be struggling to calm a group of students. An experienced teacher steps up and, without even having to shout (and maybe without even having to say anything at all), is able to quickly transform the melee, gaining everyone's attention and silent anticipation.

I call this power “teacher vibes.” The leader with teacher vibes expects that the group will settle themselves, and the group can sense it. Just like with Carla Werner, it doesn’t matter if the group has ever seen that person before. They feel the confidence and authority radiating from the leader, and they respond accordingly. The leader’s expectation has been satisfied, strengthening this dynamic for future interactions with the same crowd (and with other, even rowdier crowds).

The power of expectation is not just about the behavior of large groups. It deeply influences the culture of an organization or family.

If I expect that my students, employees, or family members are going to be rowdy, disrespectful, apathetic, and deceitful, they will rise (or sink!) to the occasion.

If I expect them to be peaceful, respectful, enthusiastic, and trustworthy, I am very likely to get this result.

It's not naïveté. It is certainly idealistic, but it actually does work. And it's incredible to see the results over time as these initial trends are strengthened by the repeated exposure to the power of positive expectation and the resulting positive reinforcement. In other words, as people receive praise for the very qualities that are being sought, it creates a virtuous cycle in which they are increasingly likely to behave in a way that merits such praise.

Now, this dynamic can be cheapened or exploited. "I know you're not going to even think about cheating on this test," isn't positive expectation. It's manipulation. And obviously, it is immoral to use your power for nefarious purposes (history abounds with examples of individuals who are able to compel others to commit unspeakable acts). No, in order for teacher vibes and positive expectation to work, you have to genuinely believe the best of the people you’re working with — and for it to be ethical, you have to be leading them somewhere worthy.

How do you make it happen? Honestly, by believing that you will. It sounds phony, but it’s absolutely true. Confidence is key getting good results. You can’t allow “what ifs” to creep in. You can’t allow yourself to get distracted by actual or potential undesired behavior. Instead, you focus on what you want. You will not be undermined. You will be respected, appreciated, listened to, followed.

Ultimately, humans want to be loved and accepted. They look to each other to know how to fit in. When you have strong teacher vibes, you’re taking advantage of this tendency in order to bring out the best in the group. Whether you’re working with an audience, sports team, congregation, staff, class, or family, all will benefit from the feeling of belonging and sense of security that you help to foster. You will allow everyone to be part of something they can feel proud of.